There are different ways to convey social status. I discovered a very particular one. And which, I am a bit embarrassed to admit, made me feel great.
I recently went to the mall with a girl. Although she’s the type of girl that looks pretty as soon as she rolls out of bed that day she made an effort to look as pretty as possible. Make up, blower, and a plain white tee tied up an inch above her belly button. She looked like she walked right off a fashion runway.
In marketing the first principle of an effective message is to get attention. Well. She didn’t have any trouble with that lesson.
A third of the guys in the mall stopped in their tracks to stare at her. Guys that were minding their business on quite a unremarkable afternoon, couldin´t mind their business any longer.
And since I was with her, all that attention cascaded to me. I felt light and energized. I felt admiration, curiosity — a tint of jealousy. “This guy must be on to something” the onlookers’ faces were telling me. My confidence was unlimited.
If I was a salesman I would have approached any of those guys with the most outrageous offer right there, right now. I wouldn’t have flinched. It would have been so easy.
The beautiful girl´s company did for my status within that ecosystem what all the hype of the past few years did for Bitcoin. It elevated it to the stratosphere.
There are very few greater feelings like this one. Walking into a room knowing you are the boss, or the wealthiest guy, or the strongest guy, or the most admired. Every second you spend in that room will give you more life energy, which you will use to expand your life even more.
I realized there are a few things that give you more instant status than being seen in public with a beautiful woman (it’s even better in a private place of course). That day I wanted others to see me. I wanted to meet as many people I knew as possible. My pace became more swift. I wanted to see and be seen.
Unlike when you are with someone who doesn’t meet your standards you want to meet the least amount of people possible. You activate stealth mode in the way you walk, and explore your surroundings. It is quite painfully obvious that many guys are with girls in the latter situation so they resign themselves to trying not to run into people in the mall.
I get it. This all sounds very vapid. But the allocation of our position in the social hierarchy is “vapid”. It’s based on immediate signaling we give others. Such as wealth, beauty; the ability to kill someone with our bare hands.
Status is all about how others perceive you. It’s something we feel and can’t translate to words. You just know when someone is the highest status individual in a room. And the lower status individuals just pause…and let him do the talking.
The people who seek social status for a living are among my least favorite people. They are parasites who chase all sorts of benefits without offering an adequate contribution. Politics, academia, family businesses, NGOs, finance, are filled to the brim with these types. These people should be avoided at all costs.
But status is important. Especially for men. Low status can make you miserable. It is crucial to know where you are within the hierarchy, and how to move up.
My approach to status is building it as a sideline to other activities. Seeking advancement of my career, fitness, knowledge, and wealth as an end. And benefiting from increased status as a proxy.
When your high status comes as a product of your effort it is highly rewarding and durable. You are rewarded for being valuable in society. For producing. For creating. For giving others what they need.
So engage in activities that will elevate your social status intrinsically.
Because I know you want to be with the pretty girl at the mall.
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